Tenebrae

I have been blessed from my head to my toes this week. So appropriate for Holy Week. Today was Day 3 of the “A Woman Inspired” Webinar. It has been so fabulous to sit in the office with headphones on, tuning out everything and submitting myself to the Spirit. I can’t recall ever experiencing anything like this.

By 3pm yesterday, I’m emerged from my cubicle with a goofy grin on my face. One of my engineers asked if I was “protected in my bubble of joy.” Oh, yes! Yes, indeed.

I left work, got home in time to visit with family for a few minutes. Which included a dialogue with D#2 re: her bringing up ancient history during the last week or so. After church Sunday she told our priest (in my presence) that we left her behind on 4 different occasions. Huh? And the youngest, also standing there, backed her. I was speechless. I talked to the youngest about it Sunday, but I felt the need to probe with D#2.

It’s not that there’s NO truth in her comment: We used to go to the lake every Saturday and hang out with our friends. We were truly raising our children in community, sharing parenting stories and sharing supervision while enjoying Austin’s wonderful lake-life. One Saturday, after the kids were loaded up in their respective vehicles, well after dark, the parents were still standing around chatting for longer than D#2 deemed reasonable. So she got out of the van and hid. Eventually we all cleared out and when we got home we discovered dear D#2 was not with us. So we got to go back to the park and get her. In the dark, of course. No, she wasn’t hiding any more so it wasn’t too hard. But that was about 10 years ago. Around the same time (she reminded me) one Sunday after church she went on a tour of the new education building with on of our parishioners. Hubby and I left in separate vehicles, each thinking she was with the other (communication break-down? Not the first or last!). So what was with the comment? She was never maliciously “left behind” and certainly never “4 times.”

There was another “revelation” conversation from last week (details not relevant) all of this leading to my conclusion that as a new mother she’s fretting about motherhood. We had a nice discussion about parenthood while I followed my 10-month old g-son around and around the downstairs (boy, does he want to go up those stairs!!!).

After this chat we (Hubby, youngest, D#2, g-son and I) loaded up for the Tenebrae service at our church. Hubby was one of the main readers for this incredibly moving service.

The Tenebrae service is a service of darkness. 15 candles are extinguished one by one following the reading of 15 Psalms. There are also Lessons and Antiphons. At the end of the service, the last remaining candle is hidden and we’re sitting in darkness. Then, with a loud noise, the last candle is returned – representing the death and resurrection of our Lord, Jesus Christ. If you’ve never experienced this service, I highly recommend it. Mark your calendar for 2010’s Holy Week.

By now I’m overflowing the Spirit. What can top off such a wonderful day? Taco Bell inhaled. Then on the phone for 2 hours of planning discussions with my team in Taiwan. Off the phone, hit the hay for a good 6 hours of sleep. Now I’m up, finishing the post I started last night.

And I am pumped about another day of the Webinar. But a little misty because it’s the last day. When the last session ends, I will focus on the single candle that was hidden, then brought back to us. I will let that light shine on me and through me.

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2 Responses

  1. Wow! I’m feeling really good just reading your post! Thanks! You are in my daily prayers, ygw. These conversations with D#2 seem to be the necessary consequence for her (and you?) in the journey of parenting. Barbara

  2. I’m glad you’re working things out with your daughter…that some light is being shed on what actually happened. And I’m glad you are having a better week! That you’re getting some life poured into you.

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